to be surprised

I think one of my favorite songs puts it well...

To be surprised by Sondre Lerche

I'm not gonna lie
saying everyone will be all right
and fine until we die
what else can you do but
hope and pray and say that we'll get by
be prepared to be suprised
better be prepared to be suprised
baby be prepared to be suprised
better be prepared to be suprised
it's all I know

I am always surprised by the turns my life and others lives take. The current turn surprised me a lot, it even scares me at times. I do know for sure that where I am headed is where I am supposed to go. That's comforting. So, Off to Narnia I go...

portland or bust

Well, here is my official plan for January 2010. That is 6 months away, folks. It involves packing up my bike, long board, and clothes into my VW Jetta and hitting the road. The 2,000 mile journey will take atleast 4 days. It is a joy to have something to plan for, to get excited about and to enjoy my time here in Tulsa knowing I shall be leaving soon and for an indefinite amount of time.

life must be a more sacred thing than a couple cheap words and a promise ring

I'm not sure what it is about coffee shops that make me want to think, question, explain, describe, and write. Maybe it's that place I can go enjoy a cup o joe and just be. I can listen to some good music and leave my troubles at the front door. The peaceful atmosphere, the comfy seats, the smell of fresh ground espresso; this is a love relationship that I can happily know that it will never leave. God is good to create different things that each person on Earth can enjoy and give them a happy heart. Our day to days get so busy and full, but to sit back and feel why life is good is a beautiful thing. My thoughts have been somewhat of a mess since being back from New Zealand. There are many reasons for this, but finding the small, good things can get you through the crazy. Although I believe life, in general, is crazy.

"And if I keep on walking on past the crooked bend I will meet my Maker I will meet my Friend It's a long hard road With a good, good end."

The Circumference of Home

I rode my bike to Riverside today and sat down to read a book. Little did I know that I would have what some people might call an epiphany.

I literally read two pages of this book and had the scales fall from my eyes. I complain a lot about driving around Tulsa. The roads are in disarray and the traffic is awful. I hate driving. So...why not take the bus? In Kurt Hoelting's book, he talks about living locally, and draws a 100 kilometer/62 mile radius around his home in Puget Sound. He writes, "This much is clear to me. If I can't change my own life in response to the greatest challenge now facing our human family, who can? And if I won't make the effort to try, why should anyone else? So I've decided to start at home, and begin with myself. The question is no longer whether I must respond. The question is whether I can turn my response into an adventure." While this may seem like a abnormal step, to me, it makes sense. It is cheaper for me to buy a bus pass for a month. I spend $50-$60 on gas in one month in my 2006 Jetta! A bus pass is $40. I also get the added bonus of not driving (YOU don't have to hear it), also I will get to meet people and learn to be patient while waiting. It also gets me to better plan each day. I can bring my bike on the bus and go! Think I'm crazy...oh well.

I can't ignore the fact that this is going to be hard and my dedication strong, but I need a change. I'm going to work for this.

www.tulsatransit.org

Who says I can't use a skillet?

"Once upon a time, there was a quiet little village in the French countryside, whose people believed in Tranquilité - Tranquility. If you lived in this village, you understood what was expected of you. You knew your place in the scheme of things. And if you happened to forget, someone would help remind you. In this village, if you saw something you weren't supposed to see, you learned to look the other way. If perchance your hopes had been disappointed, you learned never to ask for more. So through good times and bad, famine and feast, the villagers held fast to their traditions. Until, one winter day, a sly wind blew in from the North..."

If your life were a movie, which one would you pick? Think carefully. On a brilliantly rainy day, a cup of coffee, some chocolate, I am enjoying the movie Chocolat. I remember again what life is about. love.

With this question in mind, I believe I would pick Chocolat. I would be Vianne, the main character. It is a story that gets me excited every time I watch it. A woman and her daughter open a chocolate shop in a small French village that shakes up the rigid morality of the community. Her love for others penetrates the strong shield of religion and morality to the core. Love is the most powerful force known to man. It has the power to change lives; without it we see people (animals, and even our earth) deteriorate, but with it the world can change. "I do not know what the theme of my homily today ought to be. Do I want to talk about the miracle of our Lord's divine transformation? Not really, no. I don't want to talk about His divinity. I'd rather talk about His humanity. I mean, you know, how He lived His life here on earth. His kindness, His tolerance...Listen, here's what I think. I think we can't go 'round measuring our goodness by what we don't do, what we deny ourselves, what we resist, and who we exclude. I think we've got to measure goodness by what we embrace, what we create, and who we include."

life these days

You know it's funny, this thing called life. Do we ever truly appreciate it or live it up to the fullest? I caught a glimpse of really enjoying it when I was in New Zealand.

I work at a coffee shop in town. I serve coffee to people. To quote Rachel from Friends, "everyone I know is either getting married or pregnant or promoted and I'm getting coffee and it's not even for me!"

That is life, but you gotta make it interesting. Throw in a boss that rubs you wrong, a good group of married friends and a few single ones, then a few games of soccer with a team that cusses like sailors, ridiculous customers, my parents...mix well you get my life. I am realizing the older you get the less you really know.

One thing I do know is that I want to live a simple life. It was hard to live out of a backpack for two months, but the feeling you get knowing that you have everything you need on your back is really freeing. I can't wait until I head off to Europe, to meet new different people from another culture, to see things I have only seen in movies or pictures, and to again appreciate the simplicity and fragility of life. I'm in. Let's live it up!

the hardest part...

the hardest part by coldplay

And the hardest part

Was letting go not taking part

Was the hardest part

And the strangest thing

Was waiting for that bell to ring

It was the strangest start

I could feel it go down

Bittersweet I could taste in my mouth

Silver lining in the clouds

Oh and I

I wish that I could work it out

And the hardest part

Was letting go not taking part

You really broke my heart

And I tried to sing

But I couldn't think of anything

And that was the hardest part

I could feel it go down

You left the sweetest taste in my mouth

You're a silver lining the clouds

Oh, and I

Oh, and I

I wonder what it's all about [x2]

Everything I know is wrong

Everything I do it just comes undone

And everything is torn apart

Oh and thats the hardest part

That's the hardest part

Yeah, thats the hardest part

the song speaks for me on this one...